This summary, courtesy of John Shmiakin and yours truly, sketches a portrait of Louis XIII (r. 1610-1643) as he appears in the book by Émile Magne (1877-1953) on daily life during his reign. As everyone knows, Louis XIII was harassed by his wife, his relatives, Spain, Austria, England and the Netherlands. His younger brother, Gaston, Duke of Orléans (1608-1660), used to amuse himself by robbing passersby on the “new bridge” (the Pont Neuf). The king himself suffered from epileptic seizures, chronic inflammation of the small intestine and skin tuberculosis. Louis had a stammer, his handwriting was like a child’s, and he was frail, gaunt, jealous, withdrawn, secretive, suspicious and greedy. He dressed like a homeless man, had no patience for the nobility and preferred to keep servants of common birth close to him “so that he could beat them.” He was a glutton and could barely read. His kingdom was in disarray, and he had no taste for governing: he was careful to attend the meetings of the royal council, but he preferred to act as an arbiter between his ministers, leaving the actual running of the state, in the end, to Cardinal Richelieu. By his own admission, he loved being bored.
Now, here are 35 things you didn’t know about Louis XIII
1. He loved shaving other people, and once shaved every officer of his guard himself, leaving “only tiny little islands of hair” on their chins, which of course instantly became fashionable.
2. He played tennis.
3. He was a superb rider and even set a few records.
4. He was capable of walking up to 28 kilometers in a day.
5. He was a famous hunter who dug through animal dens, set traps and charged at deer and wolves with a dagger.
6. He learned to swim at age 23.
7. He knew how to cook.
8. He drove a carriage drawn by a team of six horses. In 1635, that habit saved his life: lightning struck the carriage he was driving and burned the royal coachman, who happened to be resting inside the carriage at the time.
9. He was a bird researcher and a great expert on the subject, perhaps the leading authority in Europe on falconry.
10. He used to train monkeys and sew clothes for his favorite ones, matching the season and the current fashion.
11. He was considered one of the two leading experts in France on weapons.
12. He liked to repair and collect various mechanical devices.
13. He was a skilled blacksmith.
14. He baked bread.
15. He cast small cannons.
16. He worked as a locksmith.
17. He minted coins.
18. He wove baskets.
19. He made nets.
20. He nailed down the carpets at the Louvre with nails of his own making.
21. He tended a garden and harvested the season’s first peas, which he used to sell.
22. On the road, whenever the carriage broke down, Louis would grab an ax: “he took the necessary tools in hand and did everything needed to make the repair. He felled trees, sawed them properly and replaced wheels, shafts and axles.”
23. He installed and glazed the windows at the Louvre.
24. He preserved meat.
25. He built fireworks.
26. He made jam.
27. He was a master at blending perfumes.
28. He played the harp.
29. He was a painter and a printmaker.
30. He was celebrated as a gifted composer.
31. He directed ballet performances.
32. He danced in them too, both in heroic roles (in The Loves of Renaud and Armide, for instance, he played the demon of fire) and in comic ones, playing bandits, adventurers, Spaniards and greengrocers.
33. In 1633 he staged the first fashion show, where the participants walked to music “matched to their outfits.”
34. His most famous work is the Ballet de la Merlaison. The music, the plot, the costumes, the choreography: all of it was his. He himself danced in this ballet on only two occasions: once as a bait seller, and once as a peasant.
35. For all his mistresses (meaning the two who held the position in turn, Mademoiselle d’Hautefort and Mademoiselle de La Fayette) he wrote poetry.
He was considered a bore and a mediocre figure, and after his death he became a target of mockery and ridicule, some of which we still see today on television, in one Musketeers adaptation or another. History is a fair lady, as I always say.
Want to know more about Louis XIII? You’re welcome to read this article about his difficult childhood.